Poem: Extra nice person

I have more beauty than any other,
If not external, I believe it’s internal.
And this belief makes me a better person,
Ohh! I am so good. I am an extra nice person.

I am more concerned for you and for any other,
Need not be my close one, lover, father, sister, mother or brother.
I even love my enemy. I love strangers, I love everyone.
I won’t be burnt in hell because I am on way to heaven.
And I hate the hatred, crime, war and gun,
Ohh! I am so good. I am an extra nice person.

I live in a way a man should live,
Always following the sacred text written back some centuries.
I love God, myself, close ones and even my neighbor,
And I judge how one is behaving and what one is saying to the other.
And how everyone behaves, says and acts- makes me bother,
Ohh! I am so good. I am an extra nice person.

Holy text tells me what is the Truth? What is wrong? What is right?
It shows me the way I should live, and explains why I have this life?
And tells me the right path when I can’t analyze and I am confused.
Ahh! Life is so easy now. Don’t remember when my brain was lastly used.
Life is good and I am on my way to heaven,
Ohh! I am so good. I am an extra nice person.

Even I have evil deep desires, like any one else,
But I am not sharing it with anybody, not even with my true self.
Yeah! I look so nice, so beautiful, and so good. I am a believer, a care taker, a lover.
But, I can’t see myself fully naked in front of a mirror.

_JaSdeep Mandia

A for Apple

coming soon....

Poem: four walls, a ceiling and a floor

It’s not my place, it’s not my home.
I am living inside four walls, a ceiling and a floor.
It’s a box, no window no door.
I am trapped inside four walls, a ceiling and a floor.

No voice from the world outside the fence.
No hello-hii, no how are u, no sympathy, no assurance.
Even in this pin drop silence, I can’t sleep.
Thousands voices inside my mind making me weep.

No light form the sun, not even from moon.
Darkness, pain and loneliness- all that I choose.
I want darkness. Don't want anybody to come inside.
Don’t want any hope or any ray of light.

It’s where I live, it’s my home.
I am living inside four walls, a ceiling and a floor.
It’s a box, no window no door.
I am trapped inside four walls, a ceiling and a floor.

-Jasdeep Mandia

PS: I always wanted to write this poem. Dedicated to some really fu*ked up person. I had this character in my mind, felt it for 20 minutes, wrote something and then I was back to myself. And the result is this poem.

Poem: Want time to go back

I don’t know what to do, don’t know what to say.
Wishing that I am not too late.
Want time to go back so that I can mend.
And somehow change the past and the present.

Want to change this moment,
Want to convey what I really meant.
Somehow want to choose other option,
Somehow want to take an appropriate action

Want to see myself in some other situation,
Moving in some other direction.
Want to change my every action and every word,
Just want to see my world, your world and our world.

Want to repair, want to mend,
This time I “ll surely give my 100 percent.
Now I am enlightened, now I can see things,
Ohh TIME! Lets start again from the beginning.

I don’t know what to do, don’t know what to say.
I know that I am too late.
Want time to go back so that I can mend.
And somehow change the past and the present.

-JAsdeep MAndia

Poem: I "ll erase (reloaded)

This song is dedicated to 'Eraser' (both):


I‘ll walk with you, throughout my life.
Your every fear every pain, now are mine.
Every tear that you wept, I‘ll wash away.
Just look in my eyes, you need not say.

I’ll erase.
That black phase.
All the tears.
Given by dears.
Every bad dream.
Each time you try to sleep.
They won’t be near,
Your every fear.
And I believe, you’ll have new dreams.
Coz I’ll erase, those dark memories.
& once again this page, “ll be clean.
Coz I’ll erase, every dark memory.

I can feel the pain, you going through,
I "ll bring back happiness and smiles to you.
You are my responsibility, I must say,
And from this hell, I "ll take you away.

I’ll erase.
That black phase.
All the tears.
Given by dears.
Every bad dream.
Each time you try to sleep.
They won’t be near,
Your every fear
And I believe, you’ll have new dreams.
Coz I’ll erase, those dark memories.
& once again this page, “ll be clean.
Coz I’ll erase, every dark memory.

-Jasdeep Mandia

PS: 4 months back I wrote this piece for 'eraser'. Till that day, I wanted to write more for the 'eraser', but was not able to write until I found one more 'eraser'. Cheers! to both of you.

Experience: A promise

I was in 4th class when my teacher took a promise from me. Don't even remember her name but vaguely I remember that I had feelings for her. They were very different feelings and never had it after that. Was it a crush? Don't know but at that time also I knew what a crush means and how it is different from crush on classmates. But this time crush was on a person who is so elder to me. It had respect may be because she was my teacher. A feeling that she cares, cares for me more than anybody else in the classroom. Normally innocent looking studious and introvert boys have this advantage and luckily I had it. It was the time when a 9-year old boy sees beauty of a caring and respectable person of opposite sex and then comes the feelings which is definitely not motherly. The promise she took was not to bring my tennis ball to the school. Why? I don't know. But it was the major source of entertainment for me and my friends. Just put it your pocket and play anytime-anywhere. Now looking back, I can feel how much important it used to be for my group. Someone threw the ball on somebody and she asked whose ball is it? I stood up. She returned it to me and said "you will never bring ball to school". Strongly, she was asking me to promise. I gave promise to the person I respect, to the person to whom I once said that I want to be an Air-force pilot. I was determined to keep up my words. May it was the first time I felt "I" in myself, a respect for myself, an urge to keep my words and the feeling that I have to decide what to do. What difference it made? Someone else was given responsibility to bring ball and everything else remained same except that I was bounded to not to bring ball to the school. I felt proud of myself that for two years, I never thought of bringing ball to the school even though she was no more my teacher and she had left the school when I was in 5th. Her image started fading away but I always remembered the words I said. And then after two years, I started questioning myself, why I should not do it? What's wrong in it? There is no logic in doing what is not right. I wanted to know why she took promise from me and made me bound for no reason. Then, I got an answer. There is no need to follow your words if you don't know what does it means. I knew I was breaking the promise, but I also knew that it’s only an onus on me which I was carrying for no reason and I had to free myself. I got the feeling that it will not affect her even if I break the promise and now I feel that she might not remember it. So, I broke the promise. But, good thing about the whole incident that I kept my words for two years and finally realized that it had no significance.

An Assignment: Back to Childhood.

I lost the keys of my home and was waiting for my flat-mate to return. Somehow I was killing time and saw a book named "Running from Safety" by my favorite writer "Richard Bach". Those who have not read any of his books except "Jonathan Livingston Seagull", I would like to mention that most of his books have some imaginary characters whom he lives with in his books. Writer's close interaction with them during the course makes them alive and a fiction looks like a biography. I would also strongly recommend you to read "Illusions - The adventures of a reluctant Messiah".

About "Running from Safety": There is a character who knows everything about Richard and lot more, who else it can be? No one; except someone who was living with Richard for last 60 years without showing a sigh of his existence. Suddenly this character appears and reminds him about the promise he made 50 years back to a child Dickie Bach, a child Richard was once. As promised Richard has to tell Dickie what he has learnt in last 50 years. Richard is not interested in giving advices to Dickie as he wants him to be independent and know about life by himself. Helping Dickie from the learning of his life and the lure of knowing about the dreams and fears of Dickie, who he was once, forces Richard to accost Dickie.

Bang! It’s a damn good idea. I stopped reading that book, got out of it. Before his childhood affects mine I decided to go back to my childhood and see what was I like? What were my dreams? What were my fears? And now after living 23 years what I have to offer to my childhood? What I can teach him? What can I learn from him? Have I forgotten something which I should not have?

Why I am putting it down for you people? Just to tell you that I have started writing down about my childhood. And the reader who thinks it is a sane idea to go back and discuss and then penning it down, I would love to share ‘Jolly’- a child I was and ‘Jasdeep Mandia’- a person I am now with ‘blabla’- a child you were and ‘BlaBla’- a person you are only when ‘blabla’ and ‘BlaBla’ are interested in the same.

Poem: Everything is all right

Sun in the sky is as bright as it was,
Moon is the same and so is every star.
Nothing has changed what's between us,
The same closeness, compassion, care and trust.
Just open your eyes and try to see,
Things are like, they should have been.
Nothing has changed, & it’s still our best time.
Everything is fine. Everything is all right.

We still talk late till night,
We resolve things after we fight.
We still laugh loud like mads,
On funny instances, songs and those adds.

Problems, fears, deep desires we share,
And for each other we care.
Yes, it’s real and it’s true,
I can't think to live without you.

Hey sweetheart, I am missing you,
I love every moment spent with you.
I kept my mouth shut, but now I will say,
I think of you all night all day.

Sun in the sky is as bright as it was,
Moon is the same and so is every star.
Nothing has changed what between us,
The same closeness, compassion, care and trust.
Just open your eyes and try to see,
Things are like, they should have been.
Nothing has changed, & it’s still our best time.
Everything is fine. Everything is all right.

-JAsdeep Mandia

Article: Intensifier

Intensifier: word which does not adds meaning to the sentence but definitely adds taste to it.
Broadly looking, this world is divided into two worlds or sub-worlds. One which uses bad language uses intensifiers and thinks it’s alright to use it and the second world is the sophisticated world. I believe most of us are the part of these two worlds, at least boys are. Beauty does not lie in any of the world, it lies in living in two worlds and switching whenever needed and appreciating these worlds and realizing that there is not much difference between the two. Everything is fine and everything goes smooth until people from these two worlds communicate and misunderstand each other because the same word has got different meanings in two worlds. Everybody has seen the second world.
Now, let me welcome you to the world where we use language which is considered obnoxious. You won't really feel this world unless I use some of its common words loved by everyone here: BC, MB, fu*k, as*hole bla bla bla..... & this is endless. But that’s enough I guess to show you the glance of it. About the list believe me, it is endless. So many such words and all possible permutations and combinations make it an infinite list growing day by day as if there is no end to it, as if it will go forever and ever. And everyday, new words and so many combinations coming out of the creative minds may be during their zenith or may be when they are in dark abyss or may be, just may be, just like that. Please note that you don't have to cram the list. Just start with any one to enter in this world and knowing the fact that it does not mean anything. Chances are that the first one you pick up may become your favorite one. You might end up making a combination of two or three depending on its reusability, reload time, relevance, penetration in the language.

Now the big question: what these words are doing in a conversation? It may not add meaning to the conversation but its just there to add taste to the conversation. Just to add a flavor. Just to give a support to the conversation. Sometimes, to tell everybody that things are more beautiful that what it sounds without using these words or things are worse than they appear. Sometimes to add humor. Sometimes to praise somebody. Sometimes to foster. Sometimes to show empathy. Sometimes to show anger. Sometimes to show fear. Sometimes to show excitement. Sometimes to fill the silence gaps in the conversation. Sometimes for the sake of using it. Sometimes, because we are having a conversation with the people of this world who might not understand completely if its not used appropriately. And when we are in this world, we use such language because we don't know we are using it, it’s the time when these words become an inseparable part of our language and we have to practice hard enough for switching to the sophisticated world.
How did I enter? 1st year of B.Tech in IIT Roorkee. Few senior caught me along with my friends for ragging. I had to address my friend with some intensifier. I never used such language before. It was difficult for me and I was determined not to spoil myself. Senior said "Chal, mujhe dede gali. Koi bhi, teri marji ki". I said "Gali toh nahin dunga Sir. Kar lo jo karna hai". Some other senior saved me from there and we had some snacks. Thanks to him. One month among friends and I was so comfortable using such language. I realized that it’s just adds to the taste. I met that senior after one month and I said "MC". He asked "gali kyon de raha hai?". I said "Gali toh main dunga hee Sir. Kar lo jo karna hai."
Anyway, my intension to write this was just to show the people of sophisticated world how conversation in this world goes, to give them an understanding that these words doesn't mean anything in this world but still they mean so much for the conversation.